From: ren and susan carter <crtrfam@manti.com>
To: David's Outcasts <davids_outcasts@listbot.com>
Date: Tuesday, November 02, 1999 8:43 AM
Subject: 888 Woman out of Balance
David's Outcasts - http://www.GreaterThings.com/OpenForum/Davids_Outcasts.htm
A woman out of balance will likely resemble one of the following:
1. She will be a critical nag.
2. She will be totally helpless and weepy.
3. She will out tough the toughest man.
Yesterday we discussed men out of balance. We started dualizing various attributes labeling them masculine and feminine. I submit that we all (almost all) are trying to use Christ as our exemplar and model ourselves after His attributes. I think we had a fine example or Natural Man and Natural Woman rearing their heads trying to be divisive and keep the status quo (division).
For those that don't know me well let me synopsize my life. I am the only girl in my family and grew up in a neighborhood of mostly boys. I read the Journal of Discourses (all 26 volumes) plus all of Crowley's books and many of Joseph Fielding Smith's plus plus plus by the time I was 16. I was married at 18 after only 2 semesters of college (I went to college at 17). I started a family right away, but continued my studies by reading 7-8 books per week, 80% of them non-fiction. I was chastised by many church leaders for studying too much for a woman. I actively participated in Sunday School Gospel Doctrine classes. The Bishop told me once that I was one of two women he knew that could successfully teach a Gospel Doctrine class in that very small country ward. He didn't call me because my husband was the Elder Quorums President and we thought we were going to be adopting my recently deceased sister in law's three children. My first husband constantly nagged me to stop studying and surpassing him, how would he ever keep up with me! Sisters in the Relief Society commented to me such things like: "I need a dictionary when I talk to you, or you think you know everything or I feel so intimidated around you." There were few women who were interested in the things I was so I talked to the men a lot at parties etc. My first husband accused me of too many affairs to list. I took to heart the statement by JS and BY that truth is truth wherever you find it. I looked everywhere. I was a faithful Molly Mormon, baking bread twice a week, sewing all the children's clothes and mine, quilting, 3 church jobs at a time, attending the temple faithfully etc etc. I divorced my first husband after 15 years of hellacious treatment which was escalating into physical violence. I married briefly again but had it annulled when I discovered he wanted a legal girlfriend, not a wife, but will be forever grateful to him for helping me through losing custody of my children in the divorce. I married again, this time in the temple again. We were married for four years and I continued on my path, spiritually. That husband exposed me to a lot of people and a lot of concepts including polyandry. He divorced me after 4.5 years. I am still grateful for all that I learned while married to him. I was excommunicated and married again (boy am I dumb or persistent?) Ren and I have been married 4 years next week and are joyfully continuing on our spiritual journey though at times we take a different view of things. He is not intimidated by a woman who loves to think and talk and intellectualize. He has taught me though, that actions really do speak louder than words and I have been working on balancing my extreme intellectualism with LIVING and DOING. I have been ready to take up arms and die to defend the freedoms of this country. (I have been called Annie Oakley for my gun abilities). I read None Dare Call it Conspiracy at 17. I voted Independent Party at 18. I haven't paid income taxes in 10 years. I still study. I sometimes concealed my gender on email lists for a while feeling like men would not pay attention to a woman and take them seriously. I found that to be somewhat true. Randall used to accuse me quite regularly of being a woman's libber. :) (I am not).
I have had some special experiences in my life. My relationship to God and how I treat others is my first concern. I have experienced and amexperiencing deeper the Mighty Change of Heart. My comments to the men yesterday were because I have been, intellectually where they have been and I am learning there is a higher way, a more Christlike way. War is divisive and third dimensional. There IS a higher way, a fifth dimensional way. In trying to picture it for you I am not trying to make you like women, but like Christ. Try to quiet the natural wo/man reactions and listen to your Heart of Hearts. It is wisdom to listen to and consider the possibilities to someone who has walked the path before you. You will never know what it does to MY natural man to speak words of love to you and entreat you to be softer. Believe me it does not come naturally to my personality. I have been a corporate vice president, a real estate broker, into finance and accounting fields etc etc. I have brought men to tears in business situations on more than one occasion. I only tell you these things so that you may know that I have truly had a change of heart. I AM becoming more Christ like and I encourage you to. In unity and love, Susan
From: L.M. Enterprises <htrails@solve.net>
To: Davids_Outcasts@listbot.com <Davids_Outcasts@listbot.com>
Date: Tuesday, November 02, 1999 10:30 AM
Subject: (888) Woman out of Balance
David's Outcasts - http://www.GreaterThings.com/OpenForum/Davids_Outcasts.htm
Susan,
Thank you for that bio on your life. And thank you for your honest transparency.
Lynn Ridenhour